I have a child who is a pre teen at the age of nine.
He goes to school on a week day Monday through Friday basis.
He can do so much on his own.
He can help me load up the grocery cart and bag things.
He can help me vacuum and dust and feed the pets.
He can read his books by himself.
He can do math better than I can.
I think the only thing he can not do is drive a car.
One day that too will come and he will be on his own for sure.
He wakes me up most days and says I need to get up.
Soon he will be sleeping in.
I find it amazing all the things he can do.
He knows how to shower and doesn't need me to give him a bath, those days are long gone.
He likes to take pictures on his own with a simple camera.
Kids soak up so much we teach them.
It is important for them to have people that he can look up to.
Don't hold them back, don't ignore them. Don't think something else is more important then they.
It is true if you want them to tell you stuff when they are older be there for when they are young.
They are only young once, don't be too hard on them but not too laid back.
If you want them to try you have to try.
Enjoy each moment cause soon you will be sitting there thinking what next?
-Wendy Lovelace
Monday, January 28, 2013
Monday, January 7, 2013
why do I not want to have another child...
Hello agian,
It's been sometime after the holidays. I went to Joplin, Mo beause that's where I grew up. I was unable to get on the interent when I was gone. Just too much to do.
I'm still the woman looking to clean for my own business.
I choose a different topic for tday as I have before.
I have a thought that has been on my mind a lot lately. Their are reasons why I do not want to have anther child. I have one & I myself was an ony child. I was able to make up for it in cousins that are very awesome. I was not always able to be around them since I had to move away at one point in my life but moved back years later.
I had my firstand hopefully only child when I was 22. I was unfortunatly not married. I think that and being on bed rest for three months were the main factors in this decision. I am a small girl so it was very uncomfortable. There are lots of women who love to be pregnant and have babies. I applaud them. However in my circumstancs I was not happy. Not all of us women enjoy being pregnant or giving birth and their is absolutly nothing wrong with us.
I also had cysts on my ovaries a year after having my son. This happened a few different times. It was very intense & they popped so I had not opperation.
I am stronger now then I was back then. I am a black belt in tae kwon do. I have been exercising a lot which I didn't do before. I still am uncomfortable at the thought of having another one. My first child also didn't want to turn. I had to have a c-section.
I think being left with a child and having a hard time finding a mate later on makes it more obvious I do not want any. I think I prefer the thought of adopting or finding a man who had children from a previous relationship. Obviosuly as long as he cares for them & properly provides for them. I think this world is also so messed up why would I want to bring a child into it. I'm not the only one who thinks this.
I have to deal with being the one who works and I can't always be around him. It stinks not being able to be a stay at home mothers these days. I had plenty of funds when he was ababy but funds run out and life goes on.
I think women need to work on their career first before having a child and a family. My advice from things in the past would be find a mind who meets all the needs besides being available. Being available is only a small portion of the deal. If he doesn't hold down a job then move on sister. I beg you. If he doesn't have the same beliefs as you, move on. Or if he pretends to but then only wants personal gain, move on. Too many women think nothing will happen. Oh no move on.
If I had anything to say I would say a lot to my sons fater but I don't think it would do any good. I think a real man will own up to his responsabilities with out having to run from them. That is my point of view is that he ran & other make excuses for him.
Maybe if I had a better first experience at this whole parenting thing I might think differently.
I was not wanting an abortion. Those are a quick fix to a temporary problem. Babies are a consequence of an action just not something to discard. Usually churches are the best place to go. I think I have made a lot of friends by going to church. I love church & I love the Lord. Churches often have a bad rap for asing for money or for people making clicks. I think if people are treating you badly take it to the mnister or counseling programs they have. Everyone who goes to church has issues and is not perfect.
I think for the most part I felt like a big hypocrite because of my actions. I have asked god to forgive me & feel right with myself. It''s not about what others think or what the other side of the family feels. It's hw you carry yourself & how I carry myself after it's all said & done. It takes two to tango. People will either be their for you or not. It's a long journey & I wish there were more facilities to help women in need.
I don't need clothes or furniture. I need job training. If you google stuff about single moms often they go out and start their own thing. Support small businesses cause you could be changing the way of people. I think I may be taking a big risk in saying a lot of this but I doubt many people read blogs anyway. Why is is people kow more about Wal-mart, Target, Bass Pro& so on & so forth. You can get good quality stuff from other ways. Good luck out there & you're not alone.
-Wendy
It's been sometime after the holidays. I went to Joplin, Mo beause that's where I grew up. I was unable to get on the interent when I was gone. Just too much to do.
I'm still the woman looking to clean for my own business.
I choose a different topic for tday as I have before.
I have a thought that has been on my mind a lot lately. Their are reasons why I do not want to have anther child. I have one & I myself was an ony child. I was able to make up for it in cousins that are very awesome. I was not always able to be around them since I had to move away at one point in my life but moved back years later.
I had my firstand hopefully only child when I was 22. I was unfortunatly not married. I think that and being on bed rest for three months were the main factors in this decision. I am a small girl so it was very uncomfortable. There are lots of women who love to be pregnant and have babies. I applaud them. However in my circumstancs I was not happy. Not all of us women enjoy being pregnant or giving birth and their is absolutly nothing wrong with us.
I also had cysts on my ovaries a year after having my son. This happened a few different times. It was very intense & they popped so I had not opperation.
I am stronger now then I was back then. I am a black belt in tae kwon do. I have been exercising a lot which I didn't do before. I still am uncomfortable at the thought of having another one. My first child also didn't want to turn. I had to have a c-section.
I think being left with a child and having a hard time finding a mate later on makes it more obvious I do not want any. I think I prefer the thought of adopting or finding a man who had children from a previous relationship. Obviosuly as long as he cares for them & properly provides for them. I think this world is also so messed up why would I want to bring a child into it. I'm not the only one who thinks this.
I have to deal with being the one who works and I can't always be around him. It stinks not being able to be a stay at home mothers these days. I had plenty of funds when he was ababy but funds run out and life goes on.
I think women need to work on their career first before having a child and a family. My advice from things in the past would be find a mind who meets all the needs besides being available. Being available is only a small portion of the deal. If he doesn't hold down a job then move on sister. I beg you. If he doesn't have the same beliefs as you, move on. Or if he pretends to but then only wants personal gain, move on. Too many women think nothing will happen. Oh no move on.
If I had anything to say I would say a lot to my sons fater but I don't think it would do any good. I think a real man will own up to his responsabilities with out having to run from them. That is my point of view is that he ran & other make excuses for him.
Maybe if I had a better first experience at this whole parenting thing I might think differently.
I was not wanting an abortion. Those are a quick fix to a temporary problem. Babies are a consequence of an action just not something to discard. Usually churches are the best place to go. I think I have made a lot of friends by going to church. I love church & I love the Lord. Churches often have a bad rap for asing for money or for people making clicks. I think if people are treating you badly take it to the mnister or counseling programs they have. Everyone who goes to church has issues and is not perfect.
I think for the most part I felt like a big hypocrite because of my actions. I have asked god to forgive me & feel right with myself. It''s not about what others think or what the other side of the family feels. It's hw you carry yourself & how I carry myself after it's all said & done. It takes two to tango. People will either be their for you or not. It's a long journey & I wish there were more facilities to help women in need.
I don't need clothes or furniture. I need job training. If you google stuff about single moms often they go out and start their own thing. Support small businesses cause you could be changing the way of people. I think I may be taking a big risk in saying a lot of this but I doubt many people read blogs anyway. Why is is people kow more about Wal-mart, Target, Bass Pro& so on & so forth. You can get good quality stuff from other ways. Good luck out there & you're not alone.
-Wendy
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